Trust

As I sit here abd tell you my troubles
You look at me and take it all in
Iam feeling overwhelmed, I'm feeling tired
I'm telling you about the grief that I always seem to cross my path.

He said come with me

Of course I hesitated

Trust me come with me

I decided to not continue to be negative and actually trust his hand.

When we arrived I was speechless. This place was a hidden treasure.

As we looked out over the river I could hear the wind sing in the trees. The river laughter over the rocks. The stars lit our path as we continued on.

This is a place where I come, when I'm feeling overwhelmed and the worlds against me.

As we come to this beautiful bridge we see an old factory over the river. The wind begins to blow and we begin to hear the distant train. Theses old  silos hold memories of the city's secrets.

It's so peaceful to see the heart of the town asleep.

Come with me

Again I started to become hesitant but I just shook my head and went along.

You seen the heart of the city now let's see the face.

We walked to find a tower so high it disappears into the clouds. The closer we got the louder it became. But the serenity into hearing the rushing water over the man placed rocks was so tranquil.
It felt like a choir singing your favorite hymns. The sound humed into your ears digging deeper at your soul.  With each passing sec I feel that my problems being taken care of. They all seem so light when it comes to mother nature .

The night comes to a point where I realise it's more out there that meets the eye. Sometimes we have to get out of our own way so we can see the real simple joys of life.

Weakness Within

iam weak

As you sit across from me i stare into your eyes

my eyes move down to your sweet lips and listen to these words that take over me

my hand reaches out for your hand that is now wet from the unsure thoughts that are flowing threw my head

As we touch butterflies began to take over all I can do is smile

iam weak

These words are hypnotizing they are exhilarating and it gives me a rush

just the thought of your touch sends me spinning

then you take me in your arms and kiss me ever so gently

you let your arms be the warrior and your lips be a peacekeeper

I let you take my strength at this moment I let you have all of my trust

iam weak

As I close my eyes I feel your breath on my neck then soon to follow

by a warm sensation of your tongue that will electrify the hairs on my neck

As i lay back gently  your lips soon find a way to turn my body into your canvas.

as the music that once set the tone of your stroke is soon muffled by our cry of pleasure

and  our gasps of pain. We fall deeper into each other as ecstasy fills the air

iam weak

The desire I have for you has grown now more time has continued

I am born into a world of right now and my patience was never developed properly

but as I wait to see where this may go but as time isnt my friend

time has only revealed  to me that with every great disappointment comes a beautiful reward

iam weak

I haven't felt hope in so long. This feeling has made me stronger. I often think of you

think of how I look for your touch. How I smell your scent on my pillow. My heart hurts to know we have meet in the time. Iam saddened even with time that Iam not ever going to be more than what we are. Again iam at this feeling of sadness of not getting what I think I desire but in time I will get what I need

Iam stronger than I was before

 

Disbelief

the things that are on my mind have me in a Crazz
things that are on my mind will have you in a daze of disbelief

I often think of my actions as selfish
but i just want you to myself
at times i know i have to share

the things that are on my mind have me in a Crazz
things that are on mind will have you in a daze of disbelief

my actions are often thought as rude or untimely
but the words flow off my tongue like a knife threw melted butter
as my words cut threw your soul and leave you damaged
my eyes push you down a slide of razors into a pool of alcohol
my soul screams out for you and the pain my body has caused
but my body muffles the soul and glares on your pain

the things that are on my mind have me in a Crazz
things that are on my mind will have you in a daze of disbelief


this is my story

Please Breathe

*sigh as I close my eyes*
i just get lost in my thoughts
my mind doesn't stop
 faster faster
I cant seem to catch up

Please Breathe
its what i keep telling myself
but i never seem to catch a breath

so i am still thinking and thinking on what to do next
what to say
i am just finding myself in this consent bliss

I squeeze my eyes closer together
i take a deep breath
and try to imagine what will happen if I just give in
if  i give it. i will fell a sense of freedom, and loss of power
vulnerable

shake my head

I squeeze my eyes together
I take a deep breath
and try to imagine what will happen if I hold back
i keep my inner thoughts to myself
then the person you will know will only be a reflection of what you are

MyMindCan'ntStopEverythingIsToghther
SoITellMySelfTo Breathe, Breathe

I slowly start to open my eyes
only to see i am still in a dark room

All I can do is sigh

Magic

As I lay in your arms you turn me around to look me in the eye you tell me how special iam too you then you touch me slowly awwww your sweet lips touch mine i slowly start to loose my mind. it so soft that it will make any ripe peach die i feel the graze of your strong hands grasp my back only thing i could do was melt into your palms you slowly lay me back and climb on top you take your hand and feel to see if iam wet enough for you to go deep enough to penetrate me deeply but this isnt just the ordinary routine. you slow it down and kiss me deeper and want to show u care asking if iam ready as i start to fill i feel my breath leaving my body my chest rise to pure peak i gasp. you lean in and breath the air back into my lungs as deeper and deeper you go the more and more we seem to become one in this moment of time all you feel is the heat that arises from our passion in the night air and the soft sighs of pleasure that we are whispering into each others ear. every stroke seems so passionate , every moan so meaningful, every breath seems to go so deep you hold back as long as you could, as did I but the time as come the mix of our passion comes rushing out and the feel of something magical has been created

Why I do the things I do

The things I think about often have my drift out to a space that I feel the most comfortable. I go here when I feel like I have no one to turn too. No one to listen to my ideas. This is a place that I can really feel like I can be myself. I can open up and share my most inner thoughts. this is where I don't have to feel judged. I really have a peace of mind.

Looking Back

Look back at past and wanting to go back
cause Iam stressed with trying to make it work with someone new

So I turn to an old love for familiar comfort.
Cause looking forward is scary sometimes.

Iam trying to be more open.

Willing to take others in. But at the same time i have pride which keeps me in the middle.

And I'm scared that I'll be alone all my life. That I'll let time just slip threw my fingers.

I taught my self to protect my feelings by expecting the bad . Now i dont know how to shut it off this thought process.

I feel lost looking into the hazy path that lies ahead. Because I'm scared to express how i really feel. I'm scared to move forward emotionally.

So i look back and keep repeating my same heart aches. Thinking I can fix something old.

I am scared ppl won't understand me. That I will love too hard.


So sometimes I just hold my head down instead. Just to see i am stuck on a path that I have walked back and forth many times before